Why Do Women Enjoy Hotwifing and Cuckolding?

I wrote about the various reasons why men enjoy cuckolding earlier, which you can find here: Why Do Men Enjoy Cuckolding?

It occurred to me, though, that a second post on this topic was needed and that I just hadn’t written it yet. I guess I assumed that the benefits for women were just so obvious that they didn’t need to be explored? I don’t know why it’s taken this long. I think there are some obvious perks, even if the topic is still pretty complicated.

I think women are nearly as likely to wonder if there is something wrong with them for wanting to be a hotwife as men are for wanting a hotwife. And there are many reasons for that. Namely, I think most societies have stigmatized women being sexual, making MFMs or women having two or more simultaneous or consecutive partners as being too “whorish” and something to be ashamed of. See some of my thoughts on that here: Stigma of MFMs.

Regardless, I don’t think any woman is weird for wanting multiple men. And I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. There are many perfectly normal and healthy reasons for being turned on by and wanting to practice cuckolding or being a hotwife.

*A note before I go on: I’m going to use cuckolding and hotwifing together here, even though porn has bastardized the term cuckolding so that it invokes images of women mocking their husbands as pathetic, small-dicked and utterly incapable of pleasing them, and therefore, undeserving of affection. However, I’m using cuckolding in the traditional sense, which doesn’t necessarily include any level of degradation, contrived or otherwise. It’s just the practice of a woman sleeping with another man with the approval of her husband. But there are multiple ways to do it.

Below is a completely non-exhaustive list of reasons why some men want to be cuckolded. Although first, please be sure to check out some of my works about hotwifing and cuckolding:

Now, for the benefits:


I’ll start with what seems to be the most obvious: sexual fulfillment. Having sex with more than one guy can be very satisfying and is one of the biggest perks of single life. Hotwives don’t have to give up this perk and can still sleep with more than one guy.

Not only that, but they can sleep with guys who have better bodies than their normal partner and who are fantastic in bed. Nothing is universal, but it seems that most guys who share in this turn on want to see their wife/girlfriend have great sex with a hot guy – not mediocre or bad sex with a guy that can’t keep up with him.

To me, it’s tough to complain about this perk. It’s having your cake and eating it, too, only instead of having cake, it’s great sex with multiple guys while your husband cheers you on.

Plus, different guys have different moves. Even if you’re having great sex with your partner, someone else may provide some much-appreciate variety.


This is closely related to the above, but being a hotwife brings with it new opportunities for sexual play. Threesomes or foursomes (all men, obviously) are a different experience from merely having sex with one man. With four hands, two mouths, and two… wangs, there’s more that can be done to a woman that one man just isn’t capable of.

And many women have the unfortunate experience of sex not lasting nearly long enough. Try as they might, some men just can’t hold off long enough to get the job done. At least not as thoroughly as their partner would prefer. But when you have a bull and a man waiting at home, it’s a very effective way to extend sex until you get everything you need.


I don’t think it’s a shock to hear that exhibitionism is one of the most common fantasies for women. Being watched is sexy and it can be very sexy to have a significant other watch us in our most exposed. Even if the husband or boyfriend isn’t watching or participating, detailing what you did can be quite exciting, especially when you see him get excited to hear the details.


I’ve written about it elsewhere, but MFMs and hotwifing really isn’t about a power imbalance between husband and wife and the decision to enter into this type of play is mutual when it is done correctly.

But that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t feel empowering for a woman to have two men want her so much that they’re willing to share her. It can be extremely erotic to have two men who think you’re so sexy that they don’t mind that you are with other guys.

I mean, if we’re being honest, it feels nice to be desired, even if we don’t have any interest in the guys desiring us. We still feel more confident, beautiful, and desired.


There’s no reason to think that only men get turned on by doing something taboo. Societal norms and expectations demand that people act in a certain way. But for many people, it’s a lot of fun to break those norms. It feels “wrong” and “dirty,” even though your partner is right there, either cheering you on from home or from right next to you. Even though it’s much more common than most people realize, hotwifing is still seen as very taboo in most circles.


Having a hotwife is possibly the biggest male fantasy, aside from FMF threesomes (which you can hardly count since every man wants that, generally speaking). Satisfying your partner’s needs and wants can be a very enjoyable experience.


The “D” and the “S” in BDSM. Many women get off on dominating or humiliating their partner (consensually, of course). Hotwifing creates a new type of opportunity within this realm. Even though your partner wants you to sleep with other men, that doesn’t mean you can’t incorporate role play into the activity and portray it as though you are truly dominating him and making him feel inadequate.

There’s something inherently powerful about being able to look at your partner while another man makes you orgasm.


Perhaps this isn’t something that is necessarily “caused” by hotwifing, but couples who hotwife tend to have a higher level of trust and better communication. One could make the argument that those who engage in the practice successfully already had a high level of trust and communication, but I think that there are at least as many that sat down and had a much more open and honest conversation about what they wanted. Once you start talking about the real possibility of a woman in an otherwise committed relationship having sex with other guys or having MFM threesomes, you really open the door to vibrant communication.


Many couples report that they feel more connected to their partner than ever after hotwifing. It’s a vulnerable experience in many ways and is something that the two of you have shared. Many people report that hotwifing can create a new spark in a relationship and can bring back those exciting feelings we all had when the relationship was brand new.

It can also be very intimate to engage in the buildup process prior to a date. The hotwife preparation, choosing clothes, deciding how the date will (hopefully) play out – all provide changes for an intimate sort of bonding that can be difficult to recreate elsewhere.

Plus, many couples report that the reclamation sex afterwards is extremely bonding and provides reassurance that the relationship is far stronger than any orgasm with someone else.


Hotwifing, of course, is not for everyone. But it seems that if you have a willing male partner, I don’t know why most women wouldn’t at least give it a try. There are many benefits and can combine the best of single life with the best of being in a relationship. I think it’s amazing to be able to have the sexual variety that I had before I met my husband, while also knowing that he’s supporting me 100% and is still there for me.

By aliciastillsauthor

I am a romance and erotica writer and have been publishing my works since May 2020. I'm married with children and work a full-time job, but fill my free time with writing and exploring fantasies with my husband.

Of particular interest to me are genres involving female empowerment, swinging, wife sharing, hotwife and slutwife relationships, MFM threesomes and other group sex, and polyamory. After growing up in an environment that treated all sex as being taboo and immoral, being able to write about and explore various scenarios where one woman is involved with multiple men at once has helped her continue her own journey of self-discovery.

Most of my stories are purely of my own imagination, although many have some degree of inspiration from my own experiences.

13 replies on “Why Do Women Enjoy Hotwifing and Cuckolding?”

Great article! Definitely agree with all the reasons behind it.

The other kind of similar relationship you left out is the “stag/vixen” relationship. There are a lot of men out there who like to share who aren’t cuckolds by definition.

Then there are women like me who love it either way. :-*

Liked by 1 person

I actually disagree. One of my latest posts is a share from another blogger regarding the definition of cuckold and cuckolding. If a man shares his female partner with other men, sexually, he’s a cuckold by definition. Porn has contorted the word to make people picture the pathetic, helpless man who is secretly getting off on being humiliated and belittled.

So much so that men who have hotwives may not like the term cuckold, even if there is a subtle element of humiliation in their desires.

When I use the term cuckold, it’s broader and encompasses the men and women who play on the belittlement aspect and who hotwife without putting up the pretense of a power imbalance.

But that’s true – there is a very distinct subset of people who go with the stag/vixen labels instead to make clear their interest in this kink/lifestyle. It’s probably worth a separate post by me, in and of itself. The entire area is very complex when you start to get into all the various turn ons and different ways to swing.

Thanks for your comment – I appreciate you drawing out the distinction in the different ways to hotwife.


if a woman has sex with other men her male partner is a cuckold but if he knows and accepts it goes beyond mere cucking. One advantage of having a willing cuckold is the opportunity for pleasure. Just having sex with two men can be fun but if one man is willing to lick your pussy while the other man fills it with his cock increases the pleasure . Also having a man who will clean up cum and service your lovers can be pleasurable and a turn on in other ways


Right, it opens the door to positions and acts that are not otherwise possible with only one partner. And it can be very erotic to have a partner be willing to be entirely subservient to you for your pleasure.


Some women for whatever reason are dominant and if a man willingly submits the woman responds. I have tried to identify women who like submission and deal with them in a way they regard as submissive and in general I get better service. My health provider checked my prostrate and she let another woman who was training check it as well. We have discussed the topic and she admits to wanting to dominate so I told her I was willing to submit. The anal penetration is like flipping a switch and my wife used it to put me on the path to submitting. Having a man who will let you enter him and who will lick you while another man fucks you seems to be very pleasing and fun


there is the dominance aspect of cucking a man since it is an act of submission. It was only after I had been a willing cuckold for a long time that I realized that I am submissive for some women and will do what they want such as licking her clit while she gets fucked or licking cum of her nipples. I have learned to use my sub side to my advantage when dealing with women. The so called bulls are often submissive as well since they share a woman with whoever she decides. I never associated sucking cock or being a willing cuck with submitting or having my ass penetrated .


what is humiliation? I have never felt humiliated when I participate with my wife and another man. She met her second man at a local club and danced with him and sat on his lap and she glowed with excitement and passion. The excitement has been constant with the many men she has had over the years and having me participate only increased her emotional response


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s