Categories
Uncategorized

How Do Couples Find a Third Person for a Threesome?

www.quora.com/My-girlfriend-and-I-want-to-start-with-a-threesome-and-eventually-start-swinging-How-do-we-choose-the-other-person/answer/Alicia-Stills

It’s a common question with no right answer and is something that couples have been asking pretty much since humans figured out that sex didn’t need to be limited to only two people.

My biggest takeaway is that whatever is right for you is dependent upon personal preferences. I know that a lot of people prefer to swing only with people that they already know. I think that’s more common for women than men, but honestly, I don’t have data to back that up.

Others prefer to have them happen only organically. I think that’s a tough sell in most cases. I know that organic threesomes happen, but it’s pretty rare. I know many people who have had threesomes, but having them just happen spontaneously is on a pretty short list. You also run the risk of creating an intensely uncomfortable situation due to not going over any kind of rules going into the threesome. The chances of one or both partners walking away angry about something is pretty high.

So that leaves websites, or possibly swingers groups. That would be my preferred method. Not that I wouldn’t be involved in group play with someone I know. The idea can be quite hot. But I really wouldn’t want to risk being rejected and making it awkward or having things feel strained for the three of us later when the clothes were all back on.

Anyway, what are others’ thoughts?

As always, please check out my hotwifing/cuckolding/multi-partner works.

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Hidden Obsession: Watching Her Every Move. A preview and any additional links can be found here: All My Works

And if BDSM/femdom is more your thing, please check out Strictly Business: Tormenting Tom.

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is tpd2.jpg
Strictly Business: Tormenting Tom. Previews and any additional links can be found here: All My Works

Categories
Swinging Uncategorized

Rules of Swinging

What kind of rules should be in place you start to swing?

I see this question a lot when couples are looking at starting to open up their relationship and bring others into the bedroom with them. And boy, wouldn’t it make things simple if there was just an easy, ready-to-go set of rules that applied equally well to every couple?

But the reality is that the set of rules is going to be different for each couple and will depend on what they’re comfortable with or what their particular interests are. It’s a personal question that only those in the couple are going to be able to answer for themselves.

And you absolutely, 100% have to give full effect to what your partner wants. Even if you have prior swinging experience and know what worked for you in an earlier relationship, a different partner means it’s a whole new ball game. Things might have changed for you, too, now that you’re older and are in a different point of your life. What you wanted/did want five years ago may not be the same now.

Ultimately, you both will need to figure out what you want to get out of the experience and what’s off-limits. Will you bring in men/women/couples and will you both play or will one watch/wait at home? Are you looking just for sex with other people, or are you going to start thinking about toeing that line with poly? You also need to agree on where to find a partner, how frequently you would want to swing, safety precautions, and anything else either of you are concerned about.

Basically, the rules can be and should be whatever you both agree to, don’t do anything that isn’t okay with your partner, and make sure you are always clearly communicating with one another. The more you talk about what you want to do/don’t want to do beforehand, the better you’ll understand each other going in. And that conversation should be ongoing. Feelings can change and each you can learn more about what you like or dislike.

For most people, it’s nothing like porn. A husband doesn’t just come home and find his wife having sex with a stranger, shrug his shoulders, and promptly get naked and DP her. And a wife doesn’t listen to her husband perv on the kid’s babysitter and go “Oh, that’s so cute! I’m going to sit on her face while he plows her!”

But anyway.

As always, please check out my hotwifing/cuckolding/multi-partner works.

Hidden Obsession: Watching Her Every Move. A preview and any additional links can be found here: All My Works

And if BDSM/femdom is more your thing, please check out Strictly Business: Tormenting Tom.

Strictly Business: Tormenting Tom. Previews and any additional links can be found here: All My Works
Categories
Erotica Writing

Discount at Smashwords

From now until the end of July, all of my books available at Smashwords will have a discounted price.

That includes Hooky, On His Orders: Faithfully Unfaithful, and On His Orders: Entertaining Three

If these books don’t tickle your fancy (although I don’t know why they wouldn’t), there are plenty of other books on Smashwords currently discounted on its July Summer/Winter sale.

Happy Reading!

Categories
Erotica Swinging Writing

Preview for Hidden Obsession: Watching Her Every Move

It’s been a while since my last post. Yeesh. I’m almost embarrassed to look back and see how long it’s been.

Sorry. Life happens and I just got busy. It didn’t mean I quit working on things.

On that note, I’m excited to announce that my latest book will be available shortly. Like Strictly Business: Tormenting Tom, it will only be available on Amazon and will be enrolled in KDP Select. I plan on expanding to other retailers after the first enrollment, but this is where you can find it for the first 90 days.

The pre-order is now live (releasing 7/3/21) and you can find my book on Amazon!

_______________________________________________

August 14, 10:07 p.m.

It was dark, save for a sliver of light cutting sharply into the room through a crack in the bedroom door. Not enough to light the inside of the closet, though, leaving him to sit in darkness, unable to do more than steady his eyes on the strip of light running along the carpet on its way to the foot of the bed. All he could do was strain his ears against the silence and fixate on the light, hoping for any indication that she had returned.

He knew her schedule as well as anyone. Better, actually. Perhaps even better than her. He knew the sound of the garage door opening would rattle through the house soon. From there, he would have ninety seconds, give or take a few, before she made the short trek down the hall and into the bedroom. That’s when his real work would begin.

He had fantasized about doing this so many times before, but he had never been this nervous in his fantasy. Now that he was actually crouching, the silence and the shadows his only companions, it finally felt real. Real enough to make his thoughts race so quickly that everything felt like a blur.

Still, even through the blur, he knew that if he were going to be discovered, it would be right away. A wandering eye taking in the room, peering through a crack in the closet door before locking in on him. He had to stay still and silent, right up until it was time to make his presence known. If he were to be discovered prematurely, it would make things… uncomfortable, to say the least. And not at all how he wanted this night to unfold.

But as he sat back in the darkness, his nerves only made him more excited. His heart raced and his breathing was heavy and uneven, both seeming to echo loudly around inside of him as he listlessly ran his fingers along the silken material inside one of the plastic tubs stacked next to his body. He didn’t need to open the drawer to know it was where she kept her lingerie. He knew before he entered that night, but the texture of the most intimate clothing she owned left little doubt about what he was touching. The smooth fabric felt nice on his skin. As nice as her skin would feel on mine, he thought.

The mechanical sound of turning gears opening the garage door made him jump. Images of her body bending to his will were shoved from his mind, replaced by a picture of himself in her kitchen, clearly positioned to watch her walk in. When he closed his eyes, he could clearly envision what she looked like. Straight, shiny brown hair that she wore down, tan skin, lean, athletic body. She was wearing the skin-tight jeans and low-cut black top from earlier that day, still showing off just a hint of her stomach and an inviting amount of cleavage. By the time he heard the door open, he was already hard. Everything had been building up this for a long time. As he anxiously waited to hear her again, he realized that he needed this buildup. Touching her later wouldn’t be nearly as satisfying without it.

As he listened in anticipation, he finally heard what he had so desperately been waiting for. Her voice carried into the bedroom, buzzed, light, and flirty. As beautiful as ever, he thought to himself. But there was something else there, too. There was too much movement for it to be just her, and she wouldn’t be talking to herself. The blood had already drained from his face before he heard him speak.

His voice was deep and masculine. When he heard it respond to her just beyond the bedroom door, he sat back deeper in the closet, certainly not wanting to be discovered now. He knew it had been possible that she wouldn’t return alone. There had always been the chance of that. He just couldn’t believe tonight was the night she brought home company.

As more light from the hallway spilled into the bedroom, he could see her again, finally. She was a welcomed sight, even as she was leading a new man to her bed. A tall, muscular man that would certainly tower over the one hiding in the closet.

Trapped, and almost too nervous to breathe, he had nothing to do but wait.

Categories
sex Swinging

How Can a Woman Bring Up Hotwifing or Cuckolding Successfully?

In my last post, I wrote about how men are almost always the ones to bring up hotwifing and cuckolding desires to their partner. It would be great if it didn’t seem like that was always the case, but we don’t seem to be there yet.

Which brings up another good question: If you’re a woman and you want to be a hotwife, how can you bring that up to your husband or boyfriend? Can it even be done successfully?

Just because it doesn’t seem to happen successfully very often, that doesn’t mean that I think it can’t be done successfully. I just think that it presents new difficulties. Namely, you have to be able to do it in a way that doesn’t make your partner feel threatened. After all, it’s only natural for a man to worry he is inadequate once his partner brings up the idea of a relationship that is only open on her side.

I’m not going to pretend to be an expert on the matter, but I think I have enough experience to have a few decent ideas. Let me know your thoughts, or, if you’re a woman, how you’ve had success in the past.

Take It Slow

I think the biggest thing to avoid doing is to just sit your husband down and bluntly come right out and say that you want to be a hotwife. I know, I know – open and honest communication is key, especially with something like this. However, I think you run the risk of really putting your partner off if you approach it like that. You’ll have a harder time with helping him realize that he wants this too if he feels attacked and gets defensive. Bring it along slowly and let him warm up to the idea at his own pace. Perhaps he’ll be ready to jump right into it. Or perhaps he’ll need some time for the idea to grow on him.

I want to be clear that you certainly don’t want to mislead him at all, and you certainly don’t want to approach this in a way that manipulates him in any way. This is really about being honest, while also remaining tactful and giving him the time he needs to get over any socializations against wifesharing he might already have. Some men are huge babies about this sort of thing and will throw a tantrum at the idea. If this isn’t something that you absolutely need to have in your relationship, but is more something you would like to try, approaching this slowly might help avoid some ugliness if he’s the type that will never be open to MFM or hotwifing.

Work Hotwifing/Cuckolding Into Conversation

So how do you slow play something like this? I think that if you can start a dialogue of some sort about the topic without directly addressing that this is something you want to be doing, it can get him thinking about the topic on his own. Make a joke or two about MFM threesomes. It’s lighthearted, nonthreatening, and it can soften him up to the whole idea.

Watch MFM or Wifesharing Porn

So what if you can’t really naturally bring the topic up or make a joke to get the the subject out there? One obvious way would be to watch porn together. Make sure it isn’t the ridiculous, over-the-top kind of porn where the husband is being ridiculed or degraded in ways that only porn does, but something that reflects the more welcoming kind of thing you would more realistically want to be doing.

Read MFM/Wifesharing Erotica

Like mine:

And don’t try to hide it. Again, it can make him start thinking about the idea without it feeling pushed onto him or threatening him. It lets him get comfortable with the possibility at his own pace, and it lets him see that the idea is a turn on for you.

Know Why You Want to be a Hotwife

I think this one is very important. You don’t need to come at him with a bullet point list of the reasons why you want to be a hotwife. Actually, I think that would be weird and off-putting.

However, you should know what about the practice appeals to you and you should be able to explain it to him. Hopefully none of the reasons are that it’s because you find him to be sexually incompetent. If you do think he’s bad in bed, that’s probably a different conversation the two of you should be having. I would keep this one focused on all of the reasons why being a hotwife is appealing that don’t involve getting better sex (at until/unless you know that’s a turn on for him).

And there are plenty. If nothing else, I think that all men understand the appeal of a threesome. No one questions that literally all straight men would have sex with two women at once. It’s tough for men to seriously argue that they don’t understand how the inverse wouldn’t apply for women as well. You should also know what exactly you’re interested in doing since there are multiple ways to be a hotwife.

Know What Benefits He Would Get From It

Many men find there are many benefits to being a cuckold (or stag, if you prefer). He can probably figure out most of the benefits himself, especially since they can vary from person to person. But it would be good for you to know what you think he would enjoy about the situation by the time the conversation comes up.

Be Confident

And don’t apologize for having completely normal sexual desires if it comes to that. There’s nothing wrong with a woman wanting to have sex with more than one man and you should be able to acknowledge that fact without feeling like you should be ashamed. No one is going to make a man feel ashamed because he thinks that an FMF threesome is sexy, so why should a woman be ashamed at thinking an MFM threesome is sexy?

Make Sure He Knows He is Still Your Number One

If you’re trying to do this as a way to fill a void in your relationship or you feel there are other big problems that this would be helping you cover up, you probably aren’t going to be set up to succeed as a hotwife. Assuming your relationship is going well, I would say that you should also make sure that he knows that nothing that would happen would make him replaceable. As it is put here:

You want to be able to provide honest reassurance that he is still your number one and that you won’t do anything that makes him uncomfortable. It would be best if you also were willing to give your word that he can withdraw his agreement at any time.

And that’s it! Hopefully some combination of the above will work for you, because I’m always in support of more people engaging in MFM threesomes. Of course, if you prefer to just jump right in flatly tell your partner that you want to have sex with other men, be my guest. I think you’re not likely to have that go well, but I could certainly be wrong.

Categories
sex Swinging

Who Brings Up Hotwifing/Cuckolding?

So you want to swing, but you aren’t sure if your partner feels the same. It can be an uncomfortable topic to bring up with your partner the first time. Something to induce the nerves, at least.

Even if you’re pretty sure that your partner has the same interests as you, putting it out there can make you question just how sure you are that you’re right. And if you have no idea? It’s enough to make you squirm. Even if a desire to swing is extremely common, no one wants to make their partner worry that you think they’re inadequate.

And therein lies one of the most common questions. Who is the first one to bring up hotwifing or cuckolding, or just swinging in general? The man or the woman? I’m focusing on M/F couples, predominantly straight here. The dynamics can change quite a bit with same sex couples.

In my experience, it’s the man that brings up a hotwife or cuckold fantasy first, and I know that I’m not alone on that. In fact, I had to really dig to find examples of women online who were the first to bring the subject up, at least successfully.

There could be many reasons for that, but really, I think most men feel threatened by that kind of request from the woman they’re seeing, even if it is a turn on for them. It can feel emasculating and threatening, but not in the good, exciting way. After all, if a man wants a hotwife because he gets off on the degradation aspect, it’s a contrived degradation. It’s just all a part of role play that’s part of being in what’s seen as a safe and secure relationship.

And it’s hard to blame them for that, really. It’s only natural to feel like a woman would only be asking for permission to screw other men because she sees her partner as inadequate. That’s likely not the case, but it’s a completely normal thought.

No, almost all of the articles and accounts I’ve seen involve the man broaching the topic first. At least when it’s been successful. And it’s usually taken a little bit of persuasion before the woman comes around.

I don’t think I’ve ever met a couple where the woman is a hotwife where she was the one to bring it up, either. I did know a woman in college who brought it up to her boyfriend. It didn’t go well, even though he was into it. He thought she was just cheating and eyeing a threesome with a guy she was seeing on the side and didn’t take to her suggestion well.

It didn’t help that he was right, even if his being right didn’t affect his initial reaction.

Does anyone have a different experience where the woman brought it up first with success?

It just seems that there is so much misunderstanding about wifesharing, hotwifing, cuckolding, etc., that adding in extra insecurities when the woman brings it up first makes it that much more difficult.

As always, please check out my hotwifing/cuckolding works. The On His Orders series is racy; Hooky is on the tamer side. Enjoy!

Categories
General Writing

E-books or Print?

For me, I think I will always prefer to have a real book in my hands. It just feels better to have a real book that I can hold, complete with pages that make a slight rustling sound as I physically flip the page like some old-timer still oblivious to the newfangled technology.

Besides, I spend so much time in front of screens as it is, it’s nice to get a break.

But I have to admit, since starting to publish my own books as e-books, they’ve grown on me. I’m getting used to reading e-books, even if it isn’t my first choice. And it’s nice that you have more options so readily available, many of which are free and all of which are cheaper than a print book.

How do others feel? I’m reading more books in e-format than I ever thought I would now, but I think if I were rich, I’d just burn the extra money on physical copies.

Regardless of your preference, all of my works are available in either paperback or e-book formats.

Strictly Business: Tormenting Tom. Previews and additional links can be found here: All My Works

Otherwise, my stories about one woman taking more than one man at a time may be more your speed.

Categories
General sex

Who Enjoys Facials?

And not the kind you get at the spa.

Serious question, but do any women really like them? I suppose I mean, do large numbers of women enjoy when a man slathers her face in baby gravy? Obviously, some women will enjoy them – there is a fetish for pretty much anything.

But am I alone in thinking they aren’t all that great? I wrote about my feelings on the act in an earlier post. On my best day, I’m neutral about it. Usually, they feel kind of gross. If my husband were really into them, I would do it, but I prefer not to.

Is the idea only in people’s mind due to porn? As far as porn goes, it makes perfect sense to me that facials are the norm. Porn is obviously a visual medium and facials are the visual embodiment of the climax (or several, if you have a gangbang). The women can fake orgasms for the entire scene, but there’s not really a visual aspect, aside from exaggerated facial expressions until the man blows his load. There are other options, but I don’t think it’s hard to see why facials are just the most popular and common finisher.

But what about in real life? Or with erotica? When I read about the act, I think about how a bukkake would be fun to try, but for the most part, I’m thinking about how my past facials have been sorta gross, messy, and how I was just trying to keep it out of my eyes and hair.

My husband is on the same page as me. He likes them fine, but it doesn’t feel any better for him and since I’m not super into them, he says it makes him prefer to finish some other way.

Anyway, I just wonder if facials would even be a thing people tried if it weren’t for porn.

But if you want a story about a Domme that would never take a facial, be sure to check out Strictly Business: Tormenting Tom.

Strictly Business: Tormenting Tom. Previews and additional links can be found here: All My Works

Otherwise, my stories about one woman taking more than one man at a time may be more your speed.

Categories
General Uncategorized

In Defense of Justin Timberlake

This is a little off topic in comparison to my normal posts, but it’s been all over the news, so I wanted to write a post about it.

I’m sure you’ve at least heard about the Britney Spears documentary on Hulu, Framing Britney Spears, if not watched it by now. Much of the discussion around it deals with Justin Timberlake and how many people feel like he is at least partially at fault for her current state. He mistreated her, owes her an apology, and is, in general, a misogynistic prick.

Let me just say, I’m underwhelmed by these attacks on Justin Timberlake. Personally, I don’t care for him at all. But let’s lay blame where blame belongs, and there’s plenty to go around. For my part, I’m blown away by that Diane Sawyer interview.

But Justin Timberlake? Let’s put things into perspective. They broke up just after his 21st birthday. And not to excuse immaturity due to young age, but 21 year olds aren’t exactly known for being models of maturity.

And what exactly did he do? Say he had sex with Britney Spears? Not lecture people for asking him if he had sex with her in somewhat crude terms? Okay.

And then he made a couple of songs about her cheating on him. Again, and okay? He’s a musician. Musicians write about life experiences a lot of the times. He’s hardly the only one to do so, and the songs aren’t crass or abusive towards her. They were nothing special.

Plus, take into account that she did apparently cheat on him, which makes it not surprising that he was hurt and angry. Was it the most mature thing to do? Of course not, but this is hardly unique. Taylor Swift makes songs about her former boyfriends and people celebrate her. Beyoncé makes a song about her husband cheating and people celebrate her braveness. I really don’t see how this is different.

I can’t imagine being famous, especially when you’re still in your twenties. All of us have done so many immature things that we wish we could take back from that time of our lives, but we have the privilege of not having those mistakes recorded forever. I’m sure, like the rest of us, there are aspects of how he acted when he was in his early and mid twenties that he wishes he could take back. Even if it would have been saying “hey, please speak about my ex, who cheated on me and who I am not on good terms with, more respectfully.”

And then throwing in Janet Jackson again? It was apparently a stunt planned in part by Janet Jackson, but they were just supposed to end up with her bra exposed. Whether that’s true or not I know is debated. She did have a sparkly nipple pasty on underneath after all, which, to me, seems to point to that she planned for the boob to be out.

And whether there was a wardrobe malfunction or whether they got the intended result, I just don’t get why people had to be upset about it. Obviously, people made it a big deal, but what a lot to do about nothing.

For Timberlake’s part, he’s supposedly the bad guy for going along with a plan presented to him by others, including Jackson, who he had worked with before and respected? I just don’t see it. I actually think it’s pretty diminutive of women to say that Timberlake was responsible for Jackson in that instance. It isn’t really his role to say she can’t or shouldn’t have part of her costume removed to expose her bra. He could say he’s uncomfortable participating if he was. But it’s still her body and her right.

If the costume just ripped more than it was supposed to, okay, and that sucks. He’s definitely partially to blame for that and should apologize. He did apologize, even if it was one of those really poor “sorry if you were offended” apologies.

I really only see him as being truly a giant dick if (1) his interviews about Spears were actually calculated and intended to demean her person, knowing she was in a fragile mental state, following up with songs intended to break her, and (2) he intentionally ripped Jackson’s costume more than anyone else intended, including Jackson. In that case, he would be an unrepentant psychopath who gets off on mental torture who also is comfortable with sexually assaulting a woman in national TV.

And I just don’t see that. I see someone who was 21 and immature acting like an immature 21 year old, and a 23 year old caught in (at worst) a wardrobe malfunction that people overreacted about.

Again, not a Timberlake fan, but cancel culture coming after him for this seems to be a misdirection of anger.

Categories
Erotica sex

Cuckold Defined

I have been seeing a TON of posts on Twitter from everybody under the sun saying what a cuckold “is” and “isn’t”. I’m here to tell you that most of …

Cuckold Defined

I’ve never used the reblog function here… I hope I’m doing it right.

I appreciated this lengthy post on the term cuck and cuckolding. I frequently cringe when I use the terms, all due to the negative connotations people have added to the terms.

Please be sure to check out some of my works about hotwifing and cuckolding: