Tag: dominant

Categories
General sex

Sex Toy Review Part 2: Whip

Chains and Whips Excite Me

Well. Sort of. It was something to try, anyway. We went with the Scarlet Couture Beat Me Please whip, which we got through Adam and Eve.

I hadn’t ever seriously considered purchasing a whip like this, but with my husband and I dabbling a little bit in me dominating him as part of me withholding his orgasm, it seemed like a good purchase. Prior to getting the whip, I had only jokingly spanked him a handful (no pun intended) of times. Using my hand was okay, but I had always preferred to have an item to do the spanking. I’ve used a belt two or three times, but the belts were kind of stiff and didn’t leave for much control. More than anything, the belts felt awkward in my hand and I had a difficult time knowing exactly how hard I was hitting him.

This was much different. It wasn’t the most hardcore whip we could have chosen as others were described as providing a much larger “bite,” but it also wasn’t the weakest. The description was that it provided a good sound and just enough of a smack so your partner would feel it.

We found that was pretty accurate. It feels good in my hand and I think it’s a lot of fun just to crack the whip, both for the feeling and to hear the sound. It’s easy to know how hard I’m whipping my husband, and, I can hit him fairly hard without it providing too much of a sting.

We aren’t big into pain by any means, but delivering a whip with this is a lot of fun for me and makes my husband get a little hard. The last time we used it was when we wrapped up eight days of me withholding his orgasm. I tied him to the playset in our backyard in the nude at nighttime (our yard is private enough to not have to worry about neighbors when it’s dark) and left him there for twenty minutes. When I came back, I whipped him with this toy before getting on my knees and giving him a blowjob while he was still restrained.

Overall, 5 of 5 stars, primarily because it fit what we were looking for pretty perfectly. It’s comfortable, feels good in the hand, makes a great sound, and delivers just a little bit of pain. People who can’t handle any sting wouldn’t like it and people who want something that will leave a solid mark the next day may be looking for something more punishing, but this is right at our level.

Categories
General sex

Sex Toy Review: The Cock Cage

If you’re like my husband and I, you’ve been going a little stir-crazy with extended stay-at-home orders. Working from home, zoom meetings, home schooling, no babysitters, no date nights outside the house, and limited interactions with anyone outside your immediate family is making you feel antsy and a little on edge. A brief, hurried trip through the grocery store is something to look forward to because at least it’s something different.

To help keep things interesting, my husband and I have gotten a few more sex toys to experiment with. We have to have something out of the ordinary to keep us sane…

One of the new activities we’ve been playing around with since March is orgasm control. Three times now, I’ve spent a week or more teasing my husband, bringing him close to the edge before denying him his orgasm. He hasn’t denied me mine and we had several nights where all he did was serve me. So I can’t complain about this new way to play and he’s already looking forward to the next time we give this a go.

To that end, we bought a cock cage, exactly like the one pictured above. The Master Series Detained Soft Body Chastity Cage. We thought it would be a fun little item to incorporate into this type of play and help me tease him and deny him all at once. We debated about which type to get and settled on the soft body one. A metal one that had a literal lock just seemed too hardcore for us right away.

Our review? Zero stars. Sure, he said it was comfortable enough to wear for long periods of time, but that was about the only positive thing to say about it. It’s hard to put on. You definitely need lube in order for it to slide on. And its not all that easy to wrap around the balls to hold it in place. In fact, once around the balls, the design of it had it sliding downwards, which didn’t matter for comfort, but it did mean that the inch or two of his shaft closest to his body wasn’t in the cage. It was like the designers forgot that taints exist.

But what was really disappointing was that it didn’t do anything to restrict his boner. When he got hard, it just stretched out the body of the cage. He said that it didn’t even make it uncomfortable. I even started to blow him to see if that would make it uncomfortable, but he said it was just like he was wearing an extra-thick condom. Which obviously dulled the sensation, but still felt kind of good.

Granted, it had been a week since he came last, though. I had kept him hard for hours and hours since his last orgasm. Anything would have felt at least kind of good.

Anyway, this was far-and-away our least successful attempt at something new and a complete waste of money. Maybe we would have hated a harder cage, too, but this soft one is a complete waste of money. I have no idea who would have gotten anything out of it.

Categories
Erotica Swinging

How Do You Cuckold?

In cuckolding situations where a guy is watching his wife or girlfriend with another guy(s) – who do you prefer he submits to? Or do you even prefer that he’s submissive at all?

Not that porn is exactly a perfect model of reality, but porn always seems to portray cuckolding as though the guy is a weak, pathetic excuse of a man that can’t hang with the bulls. Invariably, he submits to the bull, who is portrayed in a position of being the most dominant one involved, even more than the woman. The woman is usually portrayed as being submissive herself, “giving herself” to a “real” man who can use her however he wants. She might join the bull in verbally abusing the cuckold, but the bull usually is the one who leads.

Everyone can swing their own way, but personally, I think the reality of cuckolding and hotwifing is usually much different. The power dynamic is more-often-than-not one where the woman is in control and calling the shots. The bull is there to do what the couple wants him to do and has the least control over the situation.

This is my own personal preference – both for real life MFMs and porn. I like it when the woman is in charge and is calling the shots over both of the guys or over one while the other just sits back and watches before taking his turn. In my experience, even when a guy gets off on being humiliated, they usually want to be humiliated by the woman – not the other guys.

After situations where the woman is the dominant one, I think it’s more common for the “cuck” to actually be in control. The woman is fucking the other guys at his direction and how he wants it. He’s orchestrating his own “humiliation” at her hands, but it’s really more of a slutwife kind of deal. Of course, there are situations where the extra guy is dominant, either over the woman and in conjunction with the significant other or over both of them. Situations where a couple brings in a guy to humiliate the significant other happen, too, but are just less common.

There are all sorts of variations and there’s no wrong answer as far as what’s preferred and there’s no wrong way to do it as long as everyone is on the same page. It just has always seemed to me that – more than with most genres – this is one area where porn has raced out to an extreme that flips the actual dynamics.

Also, please be sure to check out my works that involve cuckolding and women having sex with more than one man:

On His Orders: Faithfully Unfaithful and On His Orders: Entertaining Three and Hooky. Previews and additional links can be found here: All My Works

Or, if you’re more into the humiliation side of cuckolding, check out:

Strictly Business: Tormenting Tom. Previews and additional links can be found here: All My Works